Last night we went to our usual club. There wasn’t anyone on the RSVP list we were really interested in playing with. We were hoping Sean and Martha might show up but they didn’t. We talked with Janice for quite a while and ended up having dinner with her and Kim.

We discussed the volunteer appreciation party on Friday with Janice. We hadn’t really decided whether to go or not. It would be almost all volunteers we knew and very few, if any, new people there. None of the volunteers are couples that were a good match for us. She said Nick was going to be her date for the party and we should attend because they would be there. We have played with them as a couple before. And she has participated as the extra female in a FMF threesome we had once. So we agreed to attend. Jo had also contacted Alex and Alice and told them we would be at the party and would like to see them again. They RSVP’d almost immediately. So maybe something will work out for us.

From Janice we found out why Ellen wasn’t playing last week. She was having an gynecological exam the next morning. And it was Janice that Nick played with when he left the hot tub. She also said she felt a little “used” by the experience. We didn’t get details on that and don’t really know what the issue was. We suspect it was because he spent so much time with us then just wanted to play with her without the social aspect he shared with us.

And we found out from Kim why we hadn’t seen Brenda for several weeks. She is having back problems and is scheduled for surgery soon.

After diner we sat in the hot tub with Gretchen and Steve and talked for a while. They had to work (massage) and even if they were interested in playing with us it would be very late before they would be available. I didn’t even ask. I have told her many times to let me know when they want to play with us. She gave me a kiss as they got up to go to work.

A young couple joined us and we talked with them for a while. They are much too young for a good match but we talked to them for a bit. Just general chit-chat.

We decided to play with each other and went to the showers to wash off the hot tub chemicals. We saw a woman kissing Gretchen in the dressing room and by the time we had prepared for going to the play area they were gone. We found them in the play area with the woman between Gretchen’s legs and Steve kissing Gretchen’s breasts. We watched for a few seconds then went on to find a place for ourselves to play. We ended up in the mirror room by ourselves. Another couple came in and lay on one of the adjoining beds. The woman asked if she could touch Jo and kissed her breasts for a while as I would performing oral and manual sex on Jo. She used her fingers on Jo for a while too and I moved out of the way to give her access. That was going okay until she kissed Jo on the mouth. Apparently her kisses involve a lot of tongue on the face and Jo motioned for me and the other woman moved away to join her male companion.

We had seen and talked to the other couple many times but physically they just weren’t a good match for us. He is too short and they are both overweight. Some brief play with the female would probably have been okay if it hadn’t been for the sloppy kissing.

We had sex with each other then left.

As we drove home Jo said it was a soul sucking experience. We spent over an hour driving and more hours at the club to do something we could have done at home. We decided to stop attending Wednesday events at that club at least until after Jo’s daughter goes to college this fall. We can stay home and visit with the kids and do other stuff around the house and have a much more rewarding experience without investing so many hours in pursuit of something that just isn’t happening for us at Wednesday parties.

Last night Jo and I had the best night at our usual club in months. And the strange part is that we didn’t has sex with anyone there. Not even with each other.

Before going to the club we met a couple for drinks who had written to us via SLS. It was nice conversation. From the pictures and their profile it was sort of ho-hum, but the conversation was very good. It was a nice start to the evening.

We arrived at the club a little bit late but put our stuff in a locker and went out in search of ‘prey’ before filling our plates at the buffet table. We didn’t see anyone of particular interest.

The RSVP list had indicated a couple who are both tall and very attractive would be attending but we didn’t have much in the way of expectations for connecting with them. We’ve attempted to get things started with them on a couple occasions without success so we figured it is really “their move” if they decide they are interested in us. We saw the female half of the couple at a table which was completely full so that wasn’t a real option even if we had decided to make ourselves more available.

Sean and Martha were there but again were at a full table. Jo hasn’t been too keen on pursuing them because they have been saying they are moving slow and “exploring”. But I had been thinking they have been warming up to the idea of playing with us. I told her that I might tell them we were interested and let them take it from there.

We sat down with two couples that were familiar faces and almost friends but not potential playmates. One is very short and the other is very young and on the short side as well. We had a nice conversation with them but everyone knew it wasn’t going lead into the play area.

I went back to the buffet line to get some dessert and I could barely believe my eyes. There, going through the buffet line, was Nick and Ellen! Jo has played with him a couple times and I played with her once. But more importantly we have always extremely enjoyed the conversations we have had with them. They are the other couple we know with blogs about being in the lifestyle. They had left the area in April expecting they would not be back for at least a year. And we thought there was a real chance we would never see them again.

I had a warm greeting with them and hurried back to Jo and told her she would not believe who I just saw. I didn’t even try to make her guess like I usually do in such circumstances when she casually told me she didn’t know who that would be. When I told her she jumped up and quickly walked back to the buffet to see them. This greeting was just as warm and we found an empty table away everyone else to talk. We talked and talked about their adventures, our dissatisfaction with the club, and our experiences at other places, our kids, and totally ignored everything going on at the club. They were back just for a couple weeks and would again be gone, probably for months again.

Nick was sitting next to Jo and he had his hand between her legs a lot and she had her hand on his leg as well. As the music from the dance floor became increasingly difficult to talk over Nick suggested we sit in a hot tub for a while. As we were getting up from the table we overheard Nick say something to Ellen. I forget what the exact words were but we got the gist of the idea that Ellen wouldn’t be playing tonight.

After we undressed and were headed to the hot tubs Ellen quietly told Jo and I, “Just to manage expectations, I’m not playing with anyone tonight.” We told her we had already picked up on that and we appreciated her telling us but that was okay.

We sat in, and partially out of, the hot tub and talked for nearly another hour. At first Nick and Jo started getting pretty “frisky”. There was some heavy kissing and petting but when Nick asked if she wanted to have sex there on the edge of the tub she told him that she wasn’t going to have sex unless I was going have sex with someone else as well. Their activity became much more subdued then. We still had a great conversation.

Nick eventually left to search for another playmate. We suspect he probably connected with Janice who was there as well and she and Nick have a lot of “history”. Ellen, Jo, and I had a great conversation but it was getting very late. We sort of tried to make something work out in the next few days to met up with them but our schedules just weren’t going to let it happen. Jo and I finally left without even having sex with each other.

As we were leaving we saw Sean and Martha near the eating area and dance floor. Sean was sitting on a  chair with only a few clothes on and Martha was completely nude sitting astraddle of Sean. There was no sex going on. They were just talking. Martha didn’t see us until I gently stroked her shoulder as we walked by. She looked up and then jumped up to say hi. She told us she didn’t even know we were there. We told them we had been absorbed with some other friends and ignored almost everyone else. She gave us both hugs and kisses.

I told them that if they were interested or ever got to the place where they were interested in playing with us to let us know. They both lit up. Martha said, “Yes, I think that might happen! We feel so comfortable around you guys.” And Sean said, “Thanks for letting us know.” Even though they are frequently at the club I think they are still shy about taking any initiative in getting from “point A to point B”. I wanted to make that easier for them. And I think it might have worked. Jo told me, “Good job with Sean and Martha” after we were in the car.

We drove home happy. It was one of the most enjoyable evenings we have had at that club in months. And it was all without sexual intercourse. We did have sex when we got home though. And again this morning. That part is consistent.

Last night we went to our usual club. From the RSVP list there didn’t look to be anyone we were going to be playing with but we decided to go anyway. Tom and Mary were there and we figured we might talk to them but probably not much of interest would happen.

We put our stuff in a locker and looked around. The were quite a few new people but no one interesting. We finally settled in the lounge area next to the appetizers. There were some people talking but all the seats near them were taken so we arranged a couple comfortable chairs on the periphery and sort of listened in and chatted between just ourselves. We observed the new couples going through the first part of the orientation but didn’t see anyone of particular interest. There were quite a few of them but none of the men were tall enough to be interesting to Jo or they weren’t in our age bracket.

After a while Uriah showed up, gave us both hugs and sat down beside us.  We chatted about her boyfriend who still  who hasn’t said he loves her. We talked about marriage some. She doesn’t envision ever getting married again but could see him being a lifelong companion. She asked if we planned to get married. We said we hadn’t really talked about it much. Certainly not in the next few years because getting financial aid for Jo’s college age children is easier as a single mother. Jo left as Uriah and I were talking about something of little interest to her. I was a bit concerned because has had a bit of a cough I was wondering if she was feeling so ill that maybe we should go home. So I went looking for her.

Jo was fine, she just went to check her phone for messages from the kids and go to the bathroom. We scouted for other couples in the lobby and saw a particularly attractive woman and a good looking guy come through. Okay. There’s our “prey”. We need to sit at their table for dinner we decided. I put our names on the little cards used to reserve seats at the tables and waited for them to select their chairs. Jo predicted that we would have to move fast because others are probably going to have the same idea as we did. I’m not certain that is what happened but there was another couple that selected the same table as Louis and Roberta and we hurried to place our cards in the two remaining positions at that table.

We struck up a conversation with them and it went well. We talked about kids, where we lived, travel time to the club, and about the personal dynamics of this club with all its floor space compared to house parties. Dinner was served and we went through the buffet and came back to the table. The third couple was there and almost immediately the conversation between Jo, I, and this third couple dominated. Louis and Roberta were kind of left out. We didn’t mean for that to happen but the other woman in particular is one of those “life of the party” types. We talked about the TV series Fire Fly and how it could be used to find out if another couple was compatible or not. If someone didn’t like Fire Fly  then you could scratch them off of your list. Jo and I really liked Fire Fly  but I’m not certain that would be compelling evidence to have nothing to do with potential playmates.

She told us about being polyamorous and with her current partner, there at the table with us, initially just started out as a sexual relationship. And after she discovered she was in love with him she waited four months to tell him because it wasn’t how the relationship had started and what they said they wanted. It turned out he felt the same way about her and it was all good. Jo chipped in that she understood the concept of polyamory and it made a certain amount of sense but it just wouldn’t work for her in practice. She just wouldn’t be able to handle it. I probably could handle it a little better than Jo but still I much prefer the swinging lifestyle to the polyamorous unless maybe we all lived in the same home. I could see that having the potential to work out. Perhaps something like the Line Marriage described in Robert Heinlein’s The Moon is a Harsh Mistress as being one of the more functional structures (see also Influence of the Science Fiction Writings of Robert A. Heinlein on Polyamory).

We didn’t get the names of the third couple and weren’t really interested in them as playmates. They were much younger than us and with all of her piercings, the red and black hair, and the bright red lipstick I just didn’t find her of sexual interest.

Louis and Roberta left the table when the entertainment started so they could get a better view. It was a demonstration of fire play. There was a man and a woman on the dance floor with a portable massage table. The woman was nude and the man used isopropyl alcohol to briefly set fire to parts of her body or used a burning glove to stroke her. It sort of bothered Jo and me and we didn’t watch much of it. We did wander off to find Tom and Mary and talk to them some.  They had eaten dinner with Sean and Martha and the two couple seemed to be connecting well. We wondered how that would work out. Maybe they would be interested in a doing a soft swap or something. Martha gave me a hug when we arrived and the others were friendly as well. We watched the fire play some but mostly talked.

Tom and Mary told us how, “It always ends this way…” They have had several different girl friends over the years. They play with another woman as a couple for quite some time then she will find some guy that she really likes and wants to bring him into the relationship with Tom and Mary. That just doesn’t work for Tom and apparently not all that well for Mary. Tom explained it as follows, “So I have my wife and our girlfriend and everything is going well and this guy wants to join us. So he gets the whole prize of two different women and what is it I get out of this?”

Jo and I wandered off when the fire play demonstration was over and looked around to see what else was available. We saw Robert and Lindsey talking to another couple and they appeared to be quite “tight” but not really anything else of interest. Another couple that we had played with a couple times, Mark and Wendy, had eaten dinner at a table some distance from us. Wendy had always shown a lot of interest in me and I liked being with her but the chemistry between Mark and Jo wasn’t all the hot and Jo wasn’t interested in pursing that possibility. Wendy did approach me and said she hadn’t gotten her hug from me yet and I gave her a big hug and kiss. We chatted for just a few seconds before she moved on to the bar area.

Jo and I decided to just go into the play area by ourselves. Because it was pretty early there were hardly any other people around. We went to the mirror room and laid down and talked about the dynamics of the club. After 10 or 15 minutes we started getting sexually aroused. Another couple came into the room and laid on an isolated bed fairly close to us. We probably would have been interested in them even if they had shown an interest in us. We all end up having sex at essentially the same time. It was nice to hear the sounds and see another couple having sex close to us even if we didn’t directly participate with them.

The other couple left before we did and we were alone in the room for a while longer and I nearly fell asleep. Jo asked if I was ready to leave and I agreed. There just wasn’t much going on for us. This was pretty much as expected.

We made our little survey of the play area before leaving. We found Louis and Roberta together in a small bed isolated from others. Apparently they weren’t interested in us or they could have joined us in the mirror room.

As we were leaving Wendy again approached and expressed some disappointment we were leaving they were staying the night. And then Uriah also came up to me and seemed to be expressing disappointment we were leaving.

We left and as we drove home we talked about the evening. “I feel like a leper” she said. At the house party we go to she gets lots and lots of attention from attractive men and we have had 75% success in finding playmates when we have attended. At this club there isn’t that many guys she is interested in and many of those that are interesting aren’t into full swap. There were women, this time, that were interested in me but Jo just wasn’t “feeling the love” and that just isn’t going to work for us.

Jo did sort of a mock survey of herself:

• Q: Did you find others of similar interests?
  A: No.

• Q: Did you have a good time?
  A: Yes. But only with my partner. I could have done that at home.

• Q: Will you attend again?
  A: Probably. But I’m not sure why.

We just aren’t seeing the benefit of attending here. The house parties (see also here, here, and here) we have been going to have worked well for us. But they are only once a month and it is a fairly long drive for us. We had a good time at the hotel party. And people that put on the hotel parties are going to have their own facility next month, closer than even our usual party house, with several parties a month. We decided that place our hopes on the new party house. We’ll keep going to our usual club for a while but things really need to turn around to keep that up much longer.

When we got home Jo had to help her son with something for 15 or 20 minutes and I was nearly asleep when she got into bed. She cuddled up and we went contentedly to sleep. Then this morning we “slept in” and had sex three times before getting up at almost noon.

Thursday morning Jo’s period started. “I’m hoping it will be almost over by the party on Saturday”, she told me. It was and we went to the monthly house party we have attended before.

Before we left we carefully reviewed the profiles of all the people who RSVP’d. Jack and Danielle were planning to attend which was nice. There were two other couples that we thought looked interesting and that we should talk to if we could. The problem was their profiles didn’t have any face pictures so it was going to be tough to identify them in a crowd of people. I think what we probably should do next time is send the people we are interested in a message a few days prior to the party and see if we can’t let them know we are interested and exchange face pictures.

We arrived a little bit late and the place was full and very loud. We could barely hear each other talk in the kitchen where all the socialization was going on. We soon spotted Jack and Danielle and gave them kisses and hugs. Cam and Rebecca were there too. We had similar greetings with them and I was thinking it might be nice to play with them tonight. But Rebecca told me they were leaving soon because of another commitment. I told Jo about this and she said something to the effect of, “What! What ‘other commitment’ could they have which would be more important that they would leave a sex party? I’m going to go ask her.” She did and found out that they were going to a hotel to live out some fantasy of theirs. I plan to ask the details the next time we see them.

Jack and Danielle seemed to have their sights set on another couple and I thought I heard Danielle ask them to go play with them but it seemed to have faltered at least for a while as the two couples continued to talk and flirt.

We just couldn’t see anyone that was a good match for the people we were interested in on the RSVP list so when Jo spotted a tall good looking guy across the room she said she was going to go talk to him. I wandered around a bit and snacked on the food. I found some incredible chocolate drops and brought a couple over to Jo and her prey. She was asking him about his necklace. I hung around for a bit and then drifted off to snack and chat with some others for a bit. Ultimately Jo and I connected for a bit and she said he asked, “Would you like to play with me a later this evening?” Jo said that maybe but that we only played as a couple and he said they can play separately but only at the parties, never outside the parties. His name was Alfred and his wife’s name was Debbie. We hadn’t been introduced to Debbie but Alfred had pointed her out to Jo.

Jo and I went over to where she was sitting and chatting with a couple other women. Jo said a few words about the chocolate snacks on the table in front of them and said, “See? That’s how you get started talking to them.” Then she left to go back to Alfred. I tried one of the chocolate covered pretzels. I didn’t care much for it but one of the women asked how it was. She said she had been avoiding them all evening. I told her I didn’t care much for them but there were some awesome chocolate drops over on the counter if she liked chocolate. She appeared to be exercising her will power and said she liked chocolate but would hold back at least for a while. She then asked Debbie something about her husband if he was here. Debbie smiled and said, “He’s over there with his tongue in the mouth of some woman. I think I’ll go over and check her out.”

As she stood up to leave I looked over and it was Jo. I told her that was my girlfriend. She immediately took an interest in me and we started talking. She asked if we could go someplace else where it was quieter so we could talk. I readily agreed. I did not care for the loud environment and we went outside and talked for five or ten minutes. They had been together for 10 years and married about a year. They had been playing with other couples for about three years and were really enjoying it.

I was starting to get cold and I was about to suggest we go inside when she said something very low key but clear she wanted to have sex with me. Something like, “Would like to do something else with me?” I readily agreed and said we need to go talk to Jo and Alfred about this. She agreed and as we walked in she said, “I’m having my period. Is that still going to be okay?” I said I had done that before. It should be okay.

We found Alfred and Jo where we had left them and Debbie told Jo, “I just propositioned your husband. Is that okay?” Jo said yes and asked Alfred if he wanted to go play with us. He agreed and we went off to find a bedroom. Debbie suggested the master bedroom with the shower so that she could clean up if necessary. It was the same room where Danielle and I had played last time. Debbie and I took the bed and Jo and Alfred took one of the mattresses on the floor. There was also a FMF threesome in the room playing on a futon or couch.

We all took off our clothes and started kissing and touching. She performed oral sex on me and I quickly got an erection. I rolled her over and then touched and kissed her breasts. Debbie has very large all natural breasts and I complemented her on them. She asked if I would like to fuck them and I said that I could do that for a while if she liked it. She asked if I had done that before and I said once. She got out some coconut oil and I rubbed my cock between her breasts as she squeezed them together. It was nice but it wasn’t all that interesting to me. We took off her panties and I gave her clit some attention. The tampon string was now obvious and she said would remove it. She said she was concerned it might gush out so she went to the bathroom to do it. I watched Jo and Alfred kissing and manually stimulating each other while Debbie was gone but still it was pretty disruptive to have her “pull the plug” when I was rather aroused.

She came back and we tried to pick up where we left off but it never really got back to where we were. I only had a partial erection and after putting the condom on I just wasn’t getting much sensation from intercourse and ultimately ended up using my fingers on her. She said she had a couple orgasms but I’m not convinced she did. We joined Jo and Alfred on the mattress as they had sex.

Debbie touched Jo for a while then quickly took an interest in one of the women who had been involved in the MFM on the futon next to the mattress. They started getting into it pretty good. And then Alfred said he need to take a break.

I immediately started giving Jo some attention and soon we were fucking as Debbie was eating on the other woman as Alfred watched.  When Jo and I were finished Debbie turned her attention to Jo and the two of them kissed and then for several minutes Debbie ate on Jo. Jo made the usual noises and shuddered and shook for a while then finally said she was tired out too. Debbie said she was glad Jo said something because she was exhausted as well. As she withdrew there was some spotting of blood from Jo’s period too. We chatted for a bit, cleaned up, and put on our clothes and went back into the kitchen to see if there were anyone else to talk to.

Jo worked her way to the snacks and I visited the music/dance area. There was a very tall good looking women I had seen earlier headed the other direction. I had seen her earlier in the evening but hadn’t been able to see if she was with a man and what the man looked like. I didn’t try to make contact then but this time as we passed in the hall we caught each others eye and she gave me a big smile and said hi. I smiled back and said hi as well.

There wasn’t much of interest in the dance area and I went back to the kitchen and stood with Jo as we surveyed the room. A guy, from the other side of the kitchen, told Jo, “Wow! You are really tall.” That was the introduction to a couple we talked to for 10 or 15 minutes before we left to go home.

They were interesting. The woman in particular went on about couples that were just “exploring” and “didn’t want to do anything on the first date”. She didn’t want a relationship. “I already have a relationship. I don’t want to date. I just want to fuck with the couples we meet.” It was a more extreme version of what our complaints have been recently and we laughed and agreed with them. We exchanged aliases on the swinger website we are both on and despite the guy’s suggestion that we go play right then Jo and I said we were partied out for the evening and we left for our long drive home.

It was actually fairly early compared to other times we had returned from this house party but Jo fell asleep in the car. It was about 12:20 when we arrived in our bedroom and I was almost asleep in bed by the time Jo had prepared and slipped between the sheets with me. We hugged and kissed for a bit and she suggested we wait until morning before doing anything else. I agreed and I probably fell asleep in seconds.

This morning we woke up late, talked about the previous evening, and then had sex twice before taking our showers and eating breakfast.

Last night we went to our usual club again. It was amateur strip night.

We had been watching the online RSVP list closely  and were pleased to see Andy and Ronda on the list. We had really enjoyed talking to them and they are very nice looking. But when we arrived we saw Ronda with a woman going through orientation. She smiled and waved at us as we put our stuff in a locker but we were a bit perplexed as to what was going on.

We talked to Sean and Martha at the snack bar for a while. It was nice but Jo doesn’t really think there is any potential for a full swap with them so she hinted we should move on. We talked with Janice for a bit and she surprised Jo by referring to someone as a freak. We all knew him but she had sex with him once and told us the details not too long after that. She would never do that again. We had been less than interested in him even before she told us and we are polite but don’t give him encouragement. It was a surprise to hear Janice use such a harsh label on him but she isn’t really out of line in our way of thinking.

We filled our plates with food at the buffet table and sat down at a nearly empty table. A couple guys sat with us but we weren’t interest in either of them. Then we saw what looked to be a new couple who were sitting alone. They were very nice looking so Jo made our apologies to our table companions and we moved to the other table.

It turns out James and Anna weren’t new. They had been members for about six months and attended about once a month. We just hadn’t crossed paths before. We had a wonderful conversation with them. It turns out Anna really likes being watched. Participating in strip night is a major attraction for her. It was ambiguous whether they actually played with other people or not.

When it got close to the time when the strip contest was to begin they left to prepare and “the freak” and his wife joined us at the table. It was fine, we enjoy talking to them but it didn’t enhance our chances of finding playmates for the evening.

We then watched the strip contest. Wow! The amateurs are getting good. We were very impressed. Jo won the first time she participated but that performance would have been in the bottom half of the contestants last night. Our dinner companion Anna won. It was well deserved.

Jo and I went off to the dressing room to change at nearly the same time as Sean and Martha and James and Anna. Jo and I talked between ourselves about the prospects for the evening. Sean and Martha went straight to the massage tables to get professional massages from Gretchen and Steve so they were out.

I was interested in Anna and Jo was fine with James but Jo didn’t think they were interested in us. The conversation was fun but just wasn’t any flirting going on. It was probably just wistful thinking on my part. She might be as much as 20 years younger than me.

So we went into the play area together and looked around some. There was some activity going on but nothing we were interested in joining or would have been welcomed into. So we ended up having sex with each other.

We left fairly early. Sean and Martha were still on the massage tables when we left. And we never did see where James and Anna went or did.

We talked to Ronda and her female companion on the way out. They still hadn’t gone near the play area. Her friend was new the club and wanted to check it out with just Ronda without Andy. Ronda said she was hesitant to go without him but Jo had inspired her when she attended without me. They seemed to be comfortable at the club and probably would soon check out the play area together soon. They were talking to one of the managers about her friend joining the club as we left.

It’s been a very long time since we both had full swap sex with others at this club. This party seemed to be just another step across the sexual desert.

When we got home we, as usual, had sex again with each other.